Seriously, they run whats called a "No Repeat workday" (or at least the used to), but the fuckers fail to mention the same playlist is used every day without fail. It's like being at a family gathering and they have one of those DJs that plays the typical 70s disco fever tracks, and thinks hes really extreme by doing the Bon Jovi, Brian Adams and Reef rock mix without realising how cliche he, or his choice in music is. I'm sure these DJs are brought up directly from the pits of Hell..
Well, anyway, I'm enjoying my game of Crazy Bubbles and what should come on the radio; the Beautiful South. Probably one of the worlds most middle of the road bands ever. I fucking hate them!
I mean who actually goes out and buys this shit. I tell you who; the kind of fucks that think that "don't Marry Her, fuck me" is controversial thats who. The kind of people that buy a Renault Espace, go on holiday with their three kids and the dog to France and both work in Accounts. The fuckers that in school thought that having a cider lolly was an excuse to pretend you were drunk and act like a cock, even though everyone thought they were a cock to begin with. People that were born from the turds of middle Britain and blocked Lytham Quays, thats who
Meet Alison Jack, the chairman of Defend Lytham. She looks like someone guilty of listening to the Beautiful South doesn't she. I bet she drives a Zara Picasso too and holidays in the south of France, but tells people she started going there before it was trendy. I am also to believe she is the wife of Michael Jack, local MP and all round Tory boy. He too is a bum winnet.. but thats another story.
Anyway, I digress... so The Beautiful South. Wikipedia cites them as being full of "Kitchen Sink Drama" and thats probably partially the reason I hate them so much. Every song is like an episode of Coronation Street, and as such, I want the band to die in a horrible tragedy. The world really doesn't need more Coronation Street..
The world also really doesn't need any more bands that are perched on that middle of the road peg, sitting on the sidelines ready to jump on the trendy bandwagon to make a quick buck. Now really, the Beautiful South aren't really guilty of this (and fortunately their split earlier this year means they won't be polluting our air waves with any new material.. they're old turds are destined to float around for years to come though), unlike many pop/rock bands *cough* U2 *cough* but they are painfully middle of the road.
U2... now thats a band I truly hate... *save that rant for another day*...
The BBC reported their split as the end of 19 wonderful years in music.. more like 13 shitty albums not worth the plastic they've been made out of. So the Beautiful South can go fuck themselves for ruining my toilet time.. and for giving dickholes like Alison Jack the "gritty" music they can concoct their plans for ruining one of the best things that could've happened to Lytham ever.
4 comments:
It's 2019 and I'm currently sitting in Brexit Britain listening to the Beautiful South on a local radio station. This rant has aged like a fine wine.
I also despise this band, their music makes me feel like I've overheard my parents having sex. Awful.
Absolutely agree- I was about to enjoy a nice meal with the wife this weekend when the proprietors put on a """best""" of Beautiful South CD. Before the bleeding drinks had even arrived! Had to endure 80 minutes of their execrable drivel. I think what's particularly irksome about them is that they don't even have the decency to bury their lyrics in a wall of sound- the cringeworthy words are so front and centre. I'd like to say I left without paying but obviously I'm far too English and left a tip.
And there was I thinking it was only me. Watching the morning programme and the bastards have only gone and reunited. If they aren't struck down with the corona virus then I might as well be. Hades in music terms.
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