Dissecting the 13 points I wanted to do when I got back to the UK from 6 months ago...

I've been going through my blog, looking at the statistics to who visits a lot, and what traffic I draw back with my varying rants and spotted someone in Japan had been referred from Google with the search "Where is Guri Wonderland?" (The answer is Hell). I noticed my 13 points of things to do when I got back to the UK and it made me laugh as the reality is far from the ideal.

1. Pint in the Links... on Jonny! A game of darts and a few quid in the bandit... its stupid but thats home... slagging off the gay lord quiz master, whether thats the Racoon or that other Knucklebeard and then not really being all that bothered about it.

Lol... I never did get a pint out of Jonnys winnings, although he has bought me a beer. I've bought some darts and have started to improve, but since the only reason to go to the Sunday night quiz is over (Open the Box was won), no one goes in any more. I also forgot how bad the Sunday quiz is... man that quiz guy is a loser...

2. Boys nights...OiOi with eBoy and the lads.

I think in the 6 months I've been back I've had about 3 boys nights out at most. This isn't to say that I haven't been out on the lash after Snooker several times, just boys nights out have been a bit thin on the ground.

3. Talking Science with Phil

Haha... yeah, top job!

4. Snooker night!

Enjoyed the Snooker season, we finished third and got a trophy! Check the league table here!

5. Steak night at Spoons.

They've put the price up by 50p but its actually better than is used to be.. when they have my Ribeye steak in...

6. Mixed Grill and a pint of Bods at the Fairhaven.

My appetite has changed a little since coming home but I can still manage a mixed grill from the Fairhaven. Unfortunately they've put the price of drinks up beyond logic (a coke is something like £1.60 for a half pint!) so we don't like to go in as often. Food is still the best for portion size and quality in the area though.

7. Driving a car... any car!

I have just this month got enough money together to put my car back on the road. Its cost me a ridiculous amount!

8. Poker Tuesdays/Thursdays

I haven't been to play live poker since getting home, how sad!

9. Knowing my games consoles are all there...

Dreamcast is still at Daxs but I have the rest of them set up just about but our current living arrangement doesn't give me the best opportunity to play them all party style.

10. A TV thats less than 10 years old.... probably again, at Jonnys!

I bought a 32" LCD 2 months ago because the room we are living in was driving us insane and the only escapism was on a crappy 21" TV. It was cheap from DABs (£340 cheap) so I felt it was about time I invested in some new technology.

11. Sitting in the sand dunes.

Not sat in the sand dunes yet, Ive been for a walk on the beach, and took the camera down to try some HDR photography of the sea but thats about it.

12. Having more than one room in my house.

Haha.... we're actually living in a smaller space than I had in Korea and have been for the last 6 months! I've just got a new job so we're now in a position to move out but its been hell!

13. Tescos for bits and bobs at 1am when Im in one of those moods!

This is probably the best thing about living in the UK, but probably one of the worst things for the planet and society. Tesco are taking over and destroying small businesses the country over. Everyone is a slave to Tesco but when they have everything under one roof its great.

... too many little things to count really... moneys a nice thing to have, and tax is a nice thing to avoid, but without the small things it can be a little empty... until you have enough of it not to be bothered about the little things and can just do what you want all day!

What a crock of shit! I don't know what I was hopped up on when I wrote this but I take it back. Tax is a nice thing to avoid... yes, yes it really is... things have got worse in the UK and taxation is still on the rise. The government looks for more and more ingenious ways to make sure all of our wages eventually ends up back with them and we continue to stay numb because as a nation we tend to bury our heads in the sand and pretend it doesn't really affect us. House prices continue to rise, but hopefully an interest rate increase will overstretch a few people and I will be able to get a cheap house sometime in the near future.

Money is never empty... poor people just like to think it is because they don't have it and want to justify their own existence by saying things like "you can't buy happiness" etc etc. Its one of the biggest lies thats sold to society. Hollywood sells it, the music industry sells it and most people buy into it.

The truth is that of course you can buy happiness and everyone does buy happiness. You buy it in the shape of the things around you, your house, your car, nights out, nights in, the Sky subscription (keeping you fat and stupid on that big comfy couch of yours, snacking away like the bovine mind cattle you are), the kids, the dog, the designer clothes, the holiday to Tenerife, the weekend break to the Lake District. The secret is to keep you thinking that being really wealthy isn't something you would like, to keep buying things to make you happy and to keep the commercial world ticking over.

I don't know why I complain.. I, like everyone else, am searching for the comfortable place in society where I'm happy to take it in the ass. No matter what you do, where you live, what your walk of life is, someone or something will want to F you in the A. Whether that be the government, a gang leader, a pimp, your boss, your employees, or simply a totalitarian regime set on changing your country for the better of its own, someone is above you and they have that "Rodney" sized strap on ready to give you the ass pounding of your life. It's just a matter of how loose you are at the end of the day....