For those living room psychologists out there that might want to know where some of my anger/crazy comes from I just thought I'd start sharing some of my childhood memories with the world. I'm going to start with a couple of young boys known as "Kimo and Diggs".
High school was a bit of a mixed bag for me; I went from being Head Boy at my Primary School to losing all respect for those that strive for roles like that, seeing the secret handshakes, hidden winks and favours that are so true in Life and hated the fact they existed. Primary School was how things should be, best man for the job and all that, High School inadvertently introduced me to the fact that if Mummy or Daddy was on the PTA or some other bullshit extra curricular activities, you found it much easier to schmooze into roles of "power". It only takes a few of these instances to knock any energy out of an intelligent kid and jade their perspective on life forever...lol...
In any case, this relates to "Kimo and Diggs" how I hear you ask. Well, Kimo was my nickname from 13 to 16 due to when I shaved my head and I looked like a kid going through chemotherapy. So I've never been able to spell, sue me..
"Diggs" is my good buddy Phil, so names because of his Butthead style sideburns, or "diggers" as they we otherwise know. Phil is some of the reason I got through high school alive, and I'm sure he'd be happy for me say this was true vice-versa.
The answer to"why" is because when predators have the potential to surround little fish the best form is to stick together and deflect oncoming attacks onto others. I'm not necessarily proud of this, but it was a survival technique we felt we had to use.
Kimo and Diggs were the foundation of my first band called "The Stars Collection". We put on little skits in our Religious Education class "mocking the afflicted" (one of our motto's) and sung the songs we wrote to the music of cheesy pop music like Dancing Queen by Abba. We even had a miniature keyboard we used for a backing beat (we were poor kids after all and couldn't afford the luxuries of pianos or music lessons).
We had various "victims" we tortured with our humiliating songs have probably been scarred for life. Martin Kendrick, the poor guy, probably committed suicide long ago - a boy with perpetual bad luck and really did look like an extra from Space Precinct. His eyes were so far apart they may as well have been on the side of his head, and was nicknamed "Guppy" accordingly. He bought a brand new Manchester United football shirt with Mark Hughes 10 on the back, only for the very next day for him to announce he had been sold to another club. A boy we wrote a song called "Chernobyl Disaster" about his grotesque appearance.
Tim Smith was also another victim of our mental abuse. This boy told so many lies to make himself look cooler than he actually was, we didn't know where the truth began and the bullshit ended. We wrote "Homeless Queen" along to the aforementioned Abba track with the lyrics "Homeless Queen, busking and playing his tambourine - You will laugh, he will cry, spending the rest of his life..in a box... do do dooo... he is the Homeless Queen". I'm sure there was a track about him giving head for crack but time has hazed my memory a little... that and head butting Sonic Blastman one too many times and having the ability to roll "cigarettes" involving more than one rizla and cone....
Tims story is also funny as he was the school bitch and got picked on even by the nerds and geeks. I don't remember him ever getting a lunch at school.. he was involved in what can only be described as a human fox hunt and he was the fox. We had something called a "bag job" at school where you would fill you bag with the heaviest books you could find and then beat the shit out of someone with it. Tim and his daily fox hunt experience involved a field full of kids taking it in turns to chase him to the point of exhaustion, then upon his collapse, the whole field would pile in to "bag job" Tim. You think after a few times he would just give in straight away, take the beating and just get on with his lunch, but no, Tim ran.. well, hobbled... one of his nicknames was "Rickets" due to his comical inability to run.
Kids have it tough at high school and I was no different.. I just dealt with it in a slightly different way to most by making a show of things to deflect the bullying. The Stars Collection was Phil and my first accepted fan base and people actually liked what we did. We were funny and weird and in a time of Beavis and Butthead, Ren and Stimpy and all the other weird and funny things MTV were doing at the time and people liked it. We were still outsiders but people knew who were were and to leave us alone or feel the wrath of our songs that the rest of class would be singing about them...
So thats that... we were the original Tenacious D... *rock* :)
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It's refreshing for someone to admit they were mean to other kids at school; it's just the way it is. School is dog-eat-dog, which is why I don't miss it at all!
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