Showing posts with label nintendo. Show all posts
Showing posts with label nintendo. Show all posts

Wednesday, 25 April 2007

GamePro do a list of 52 of the most Important games ever... manages to ignore Sega and misses the mark by miles..

Starting here and baring in mind this is supposed to be a list of the most important games of all time this list manages to miss the mark by miles. Holy fuck someone hates Sega/loves Sony over at GamePro (maybe they gave them a batch of the PS3s they have lying around doing nothing...) so rather than creating my own list, I'm going to cover just 10 games they missed due to n00bism / stupidity / being 12 years old.



1. Sonic the Hedgehog - Sega Genesis/Master System/Game Gear
Surely this was one of the first battles of a console and caused more playground fights than any other pair in gaming history? Everyone had a favorite, whether it was the furry little Blue Hedgehog, or a fat Italian Plumber but this game started the term "console war" pitting it side by side with Nintendos mascot. If that alone doesn't justify its place on the list I don't know what the fuck will...




2. Sensible World of Soccer - Amiga/ PC / Atari ST(?)
Not a single football game on that list (damn Americans) but this is the first truly classic football game before licensing deals/EA dominance took over. Diehard fans are still creating updates for this game, it was just that good. Management decisions, glorious gameplay and difficulty, in its time this game had it all (and all the player names to boot)! This game is still one of the only great Player Manager football games available to date, 15 years later!



3. Monkey Island - - Amiga/ PC / Atari ST
LeChuck and Guybrush, Guybrush and Le Chuck... what a pair they are! Not the first point and click adventure, but it certainly led the way for Lucas Arts in terms of defining a pretty high standard of comedic script writing and a seemingly limitless number of possibilities for item combinations and actions. With 3 sequels, and numerous other classic Lucas Arts titles that follows (Day of the Tentacle and the brilliant Sam and Max are amongst my own personal favorites) this was definitely an important title for the adventure game genre.


4. Shenmue - Sega Dreamcast
Not only did this game show that a massive budget doesn't guarentee you success, nor does years of planning and script writing, it also showed what it technically possible with the Dreamcast, and within the world of video games. Hoping that the days of not being able to interact with all the objects in a game, Shenmue allowed us to play, fiddle and explore every item of the game, including drawers, cupboards and tables in random peoples houses.

I felt the western release of Shenmue was massively let down by poor (nay, terrible) voice acting which was a turn off for a lot of my friends at the time. If you could look past that, as hard as it was, what you found was a pretty engrossing adventure and quite deserved of a place in the most important video games of all time.


5. Crash Bandicoot - PSX
Crash became the "Mario" of Sonys console and his release into the Playstation catalog was much needed at the time. Crash Bandicoot became one of the first console shifters for the younger PSX audience and is responsible for many a Playstation in the kids bedroom. Whilst nowhere near as good or technically brilliant as Mario 64 on the N64, the Crash introduction as a brand name allowed for many more titles under its licence and yearly updates and versions. They even released a crappy Mario Kart clone or two, keeping all the Nintendo like fun accessible for those with the Sony console, and in terms of the market, I feel that deserves a place on the list.



6. Tomb Raider - PSX
This game became the first game to prove that sex symbols work to sell video games to teenage boys. Lara Croft instantly became the pinup of the day, with rumors circulating of "nude cheats" got the blood pumping to a certain body part that the industry hadn't seen much of before in any other form than cheap sex games. Since Lara there has been a strew of other game hotties, but lest we forget where Sex Symbols in games started to hit the mainstream.



7. Resident Evil - PSX / Sega Saturn
Fuck Resident Evil 4, this is the important Resident Evil. How dare they say that RE4 is more important than the founder of the Survival Horror genre! Where the likes of Alone in the Dark had failed, Resident Evil blasted its way onto the scene with a mixture of fear, tension and great puzzle solving like we had never seen before. RE led the way for Silent Hill, Illbleed, Dead Rising and every other survival horror title ever, showing us what in game tension should be all about.





8. Pokemon - Nintendo Gameboy

Probably the strangest omission I found seen as this is still going and has done more the burn the Nintendo brand into the mind of a generation than any other game, arguably more than even Mario. Pokemon has certainly help keep Nintendo afloat during the hard times of its previous games consoles.

You might not instantly know Pokemon is a Nintendo trademark, but I'm damned if you don't know what Pokemon is. Pokemon and its continuing reign of terror showed the industry how to market to kids and to be able to expand out of solely video games.




9
. Double Dragon - Arcade
Ahh... the signs of a misspent youth in the arcade, but Double Dragon led the way for many of the great CPS2 games and arcade titles, including Final Fight, Knights of the Round, Streets of Rage, Golden Axe, Cadillacs and Dinosaurs and many other scrolling beat 'em ups. Whips, baseball bats and scary black giants that looked like Mr T.. this game rocked hard! Double Dragon started one of my favorite genres of games, and therefore deserves homage.


10. Katamari Damacy - PS2
Now there are many other titles I could list and justify, but I feel Katamari deserves a place because it proves a point that I have been trying to make for years, and is one of the only games I can recall that does it; it proves that crazy Japanese titles can and do work in the western hemisphere.

This game is truly brilliant, truly Japanese and without its successful launch in the west, it would be unlikely we would've seen the brilliant Loco Roco or a number of other games deemed to Japanese for our differing tastes.



Well, thats my choice of 10 games that should've made it to that list in the top 50. Granted it is somewhat an opinion outside of the top ten (Madden in second can eat my ass..) but really, not a single Sega title in there showed how much GamePro suck balls...

Wednesday, 11 April 2007

Q2 PAL Release Dates shocking for the Wii - Fuck you Nintendo.... fuck you in the eye...

I've been waiting for Paper Mario since I was fortunate enough to get my Wii just before Xmas after weeks of hounding at my local Tescos (And their lies about not getting more stock in..). In fact, I've been waiting for any "good" game for the Wii since putting Zelda down.

Wii Sports are great, well.. the bowling and baseball elements are anyway, but they're definitely not justifying a price tag and Nintendo got it right not to "charge" for it. Zelda is one of the greatest games of all time... and once I get my component cable Ill be back into it (it looks shit on my current TV via S-video cables), but there isn't much out at the moment justifying a PAL price tag. The games I had interest in (Trauma Center and Super Swing Golf) have been postponed in Europe and are coming soon (6 months late isn't good enough in 2007).

I'm starting to see the light and almost believing the Wii is a fad... I hate to say it too, but Nintendo Europe are doing NOTHING to rectify this and I just think we will continue to get the shaft throughout the life of the Wii. I was hoping to hear some good news when searching for PAL releases in Q2, a quarter thats never really full of great games, but as Nintendo have fucked us out of the release of a lot of games thus far, I wanted to see one "Home Run" title to make me believe in the Big N.

But the Wii line up is as follows for Q2 in Europe:
  • Wing Island (Nintendo / Hudson) - 13th April 2007
Never heard of it... Hudson haven't released a good game since Saturn Bomberman arguably and their latest revision, Bomberman Act:Zero is an atrocity to man that should be buried in Nevada with all those copies of E.T
  • Chicken Little: Ace in Action (Disney Interactive Studios) - 20th April 2007
Don't make me punch someone in the mouth...
  • Cooking Mama Wii (505 Games) - April 2007
I actually have to say I kinda want to play thing game *hides head in shame*
  • Elevator Action (505 Games) - April 2007
Sounds like cheap porn...
  • Pop'n Pop (505 Games) - April 2007
Bust A Move ripoff maybe? Jordans breasts at 35,000ft? Who knows...
  • Heatseeker (Codemasters) - April 2007
Again, sounds like cheap porn... involving Cowboys and pudding in hot tubs... *shudders*
  • BIONICLE Heroes (Eidos / TT Games) - April 2007
Wow... I can already get this title on my 360 so I'm not going to pay more for a bastardised PAL Wii version.
  • Eledees (Konami) - April 2007
NO NO NO NO NO!!! ITS ELEBITS YOU FUCKS!!!! I really, really, REALLY can't believe they had to rename this game... and I really can't believe how late this game is as its one of the few games I really wanted to play. It's since been ripped to shreds so I'm not even sure I'm going to bother now anyway.
  • Impossible Mission (System 3) - April 2007
Woohoo... old skool C64 action. Impossible Mission in my memories was an amazing game and I'm afraid to emulate it in fear of shattering that illusion. If this game blows I'm going to be very sad indeed.
  • Mario Strikers Charged Football (Nintendo) - 25th May 2007
First game to support online play.. hmm... nah, Winning Eleven X anyone??
  • Brunswick Bowling Wii (505 Games) - May 2007
Wii Bowling is about as professional as my bowling fix needs to be and that came free with my Wii...
  • World Championship Poker Featuring Howard Lederer: All In Wii (505 Games) - May 2007
Gambling for fake money... sounds great! Oh wait... no, no it doesn't... PKR.com?
  • Spider-Man The Movie 3 (Activision) - May 2007
Movie exclusives... now they're always great games...
  • Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End (Disney Interactive Studios) - May 2007
... see previous sarcasm...
  • Mortal Kombat: Armageddon (Midway) - May 2007
Has there not already been an Mortal Kombat: Armageddon?! Great use of a cliche word rather than a number..
  • Puzzle Balls (System 3) - May 2007
Oh LOLOL... better than Sticky Balls I guess!
  • Chicken Shoot + Egg Catcher (ZOO Digital Publishing) - May 2007
So let me get this straight... I have to massacre chickens by blowing them to bits with a shotgun, then I have to steal their eggs? What a great idea for a game! 0.o
  • Pangya! Golf with Style (Nintendo) - June 2007
Golf with Style. Notice the capitalisation of the word Style. Fuck me Nintendo, why not call it "Paris Hiltons Pangya! Golf with Style" and have that cum gobbling whore say "Thats hot..." after every shot. I'm seeing pink golf bags and golf balls with her Chihuahua on...
  • Dave Mirra Racing Wii (505 Games) - June 2007
I wondered what happened to the source code for BMX XXX... well heres our answer!
  • Transformers - June 2007
Oh please... leave the movie exclusives alone will you! Transformers was good back in the day... LEAVE IT ALONE!!
  • Mercury Meltdown Revolution (Ignition) - Q2 2007
You think someone would have told the development team that mercury is perpetually in a liquid state and the concept of it melting isn't a revolution...
  • Metal Slug Anthology (Ignition) - Q2 2007
Great game... emulated brilliantly by my original Xbox that still resides underneath my TV.



Well... thats the lot! No Super Paper Mario, no Mario Galaxy, no Metroid, no Resident Evil 4 for Wii. Nothing! Youll see those titles on the other side of the Atlantic but not in Europe. So fuck you Nintendo, I'm off to Mr. Modchips so I can actually play some good games on the console with so much promise. This is the last time I get stung by a PAL machine, I swear to fucking Christ!!

Monday, 8 January 2007

The Angry Nintendo Nerd

Last nights bottle of red wine in the Links with the scummy sediment in the bottom hasn't sat well with my stomach, and our room this morning smelt like a backstreet Kebab house. To make matters worse I had a mouthful of the stuff which nearly made me puke! Stupid Links and its crappy Sunday night quiz... bring back £1 a pint, thats what I say.... £2.25+ for a pint of shitty lager is a joke so Im back on the wine, but even thats gone up £2 a bottle and has f*cking rancid sediment in the bottle!?! I may start taking my own booze out with me.... that'll learn 'em! (lol.. deliberate sic)

Anyway, todays post is about the Angry Nintendo Nerd found at Screw Attack dot com and his wonderful reviews of crappy old NES games from many a moon ago. Its definitely NSFW material but if your boss doesnt mind a bit (sic!!) of swearing then check it out.. its probably one of the funniest things I watched last year! His review of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles on the NES made me spit coffee on the wall in my office so its pretty damn funny!

One of my favorite comments is about the Nintendo Power Glove.. he says "Now youre playing with Power...Now youre playing with f*cking SHIT! Youre better off with shit than this f*cked up shit! etc etc...

Check him out in any case, he rocks!! :)