Showing posts with label kfc. Show all posts
Showing posts with label kfc. Show all posts

Friday, 20 April 2007

Honey BBQ Boneless Bites : Pain, Expensive and more Pain...

If you live in the shithole we call the UK you have probably seen the advertisement for KFCs new Honey BBQ chicken on TV. If you haven't, its advertised with delicious looking chicken pieces on a rack being drizzled in luscious BBQ sauce in slow motion; one of those adverts that if you're hungry sends you directly to the fridge.

So I thought I would give it a whirl this week, being Filthy Friday and all, and I have to say I was left disappointed and in pain....

The fat guy behind the KFC counter (who looked a lot like Michael Moore actually) grabbed a few scraps of chicken then took them over to a vat of disgusting looking hot sauce and I knew I was set for disappointment from the get go. The box reminded me of the con of popcorn chicken, again scraps of chicken thrown in the smallest container they could find.

I got back to the office and the first thing I got stuck into was the BBQ bites. As I opened the box I got a distinct acidic waft that burnt my nostrils a little (they smelt good in the bag driving back though) and was met with the above and below images.

The first image I've shrunk but the second is full high res taken with our Canon EOS 350d digital SLR and I recommend checking out the detailing on that chicken because it can only be described as fucking disgusting! It looked like a cross between something the cat dragged in and something it later shat back out...

But fast food is often like that, so I thought I better give it the taste test to confirm my already suspicious mind. One bite and my teeth moved into a firework display of pain. My mouth exploded with the honey entering every little flaw in my "british smile" and not having the best teeth at the minute they were now feeling the wrath of not having a dentist visit in 18 months (bad I know but who has the money when you can't get an NHS dentist..).

I preservered through the pain and tastewise they were very sharp and acidic. If youre a big fan of McDonalds BBQ sauce over KFCs then you'll love these Im sure, but for me it burns my chest. So not only did I have to suffer on the processing, the digestion also came back to haunt me. The sauce is so powerful it completely masks the coating which would be the only redeeming factor KFC has to offer given theyre supposed to be chicken experts and all.

At £2.49 (over $5 at the current exchange rate..) for 5 little blobs of chicken this will certainly be the last time I get them. If you want to recreate them without having to support KFC in the process just buy a bag of shit chicken nuggets from tesco for 52p or whatever the value brand nuggets cost (*shudders* I don't actually want to know what is in 50p for 40 chicken nuggets..) and steal a few free pots of BBQ sauce from McShits... trust me, it'll be exactly the same.....

Score: 1 and a half BBQ Boneless Pieces out of 5

Friday, 12 January 2007

Weird Dreams, Filthy Friday Challenge and General Stupidity

Its Filthy Friday and I am still alive for now... I havent actually done the challenge yet, were preparing our thoughts for what the challenge is going to be today; Warde is going for the raised bar on the Mini Fillets to 6, Neil is going to try the full 5 Mini Fillets and not pussy out on the last one and Im still undecided! Ive come up with a fair few new challenges and a concept for putting it all together into something wonderful, but Im keeping it close to my chest for now *paranoid gazes around for onlookers and idea thieves*

New challenge ideas involve 15 Hot Wings (timed), 3 or More Big Macs, Bargain Bucket (Ive already done that before!! ) and other obvious ones... there are lots I could set up and in time I will be doing soon!

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I had a weird dream on Thursday, I was in the Crystal Maze doing a challenge and Richard o Brian started counting down for the lock in. He said I put two feet on the ground, which I didnt.. so Ibeat the living piss out of him. Then later in the dream some guys in the street also said I put two feet on the ground in the challenge so I beat the piss out of them, with umbrellas Dead Rising style! Maybe I could analyze this to say Im afraid to have people seeing that I have both feet on the ground (being the non committal person that I am) but wtf has Richard o Brian got to do with it, and wtf are the umbrellas about... or I could look at it like Richard o Brian is a douche and deserved the tw*tting, and so did the dumbasses in the street. Who knows but I told you I was mental!!!

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Right, my challenge is set! 15 in 15... thats right. HOT WINGS BABY!

KFC
Achievement : Eat 15 Hotwings (15 minutes maximum)
STATUS :: INCOMPLETE

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Winner! 15 in 15... challenge complete! Challenge complete in around 12 minutes too... and I even had time to be walking around and typing with my none greased fingers! It was, as I said to Paul, Awesomeness Cubed!!!

KFC
Achievement : Eat 15 Hotwings (15 minutes maximum)
STATUS :: COMPLETE

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Friday, 5 January 2007

The Mini Fillet Challenge

Well Ive just this minute finished the "KFC Mini Fillet challenge" and it was great! A little too easy but none the less it was great.... unlike the Double Quarter Pounder c0wd3th challenge which is just asking for trouble (no-one could eat 3 Double Quarter Pounders from McDonalds and expect to live).

The Mini Fillet challenge involves eating 5 Mini Fillet burgers in 10 minutes...thats it! Sounds easy doesnt it, and you're right, it is! Wanna raise the bar?! Go right ahead!
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I should post the rather funny story of us ordering them too as its the best part. I set the mini Fillet to the guys in the office as part of our "Filthy Friday" goodness, our one day of the week we eat junk food at lunch, and they seemed up for it!

So Neil and Steve headed out to KFC to pick up our order... of 15 mini fillets. Steve is a skinny whippet at the best of times, and he ordered a large fries as well, so Neil started the order with that.

KFC Scroat : "Welcome to KFC Drivethru... can I take your order please?"
Neil : "Can I order a large fries... and 15 Mini Fillets?"
KFC Scroat : "Sorry... how many mini fillets??"
Neil : "15"
KFC Scroat : "FIFTEEEEN???!!!"
Neil :"Yes, fifteen.... as in one five.... fifteen..."
KFC Scroat : "Ok... 15????"
Neil : "Yes, god damn it.... FIFTEEN MINI FILLETS!! .. (bitch)"
KFC Scroat : "Ok... thats £16.17 at the window please"
Neil : "....Dick..."

So in any case, we got three bags of mini fillets and proceeded to munch them once they got back to the office. Neil was only just defeated (but I'll put that down to the soup he'd had about an hour before I set the challenge) and he at 4 and just the fillet of the last burger. Steve and I now both hold the Mini Fillet Badge for completing the challenge just like on Xbox Live!!


KFC
Achievement Unlocked : Mini Fillet Challenge Complete : 25 Life Points!!